tee hee... ya know I make some postings on my myspace site, and it sucks I can barely get the blog to appear. this is so much easier but yet I neglect it. *sigh* I always chose to make my life more difficult.
So whats up? Is anyone still out there? Things have been well for me.... I have calmed down ALOT, I feel great. Outlook is good...now if I could only lose 10-15 pds, and get that boy I like, life would be great. Oh yea and new job, because I was just notified I will be laid off as of August 1st. yea great huh? Im not too upset by it all, I;ve been wanting out of here for a long time, at least this way its mutual.... and they will provide me with a good reference to make themselves feel better about letting me go when I have son to support. I actually have na interview this afternoon, the pay is GREAT, the location is the same, and the hours are 9-6...sounds good to me. So please say a prayer.
I've been spending a lot of time at home. My friend Josh hangs with me alot. We laugh, and play fight all the time. the FB is still around. We are mostly friends, he wants more, I do not. I am quite happy with my little life I've created for myself. I am still wanting #1 crush... he teases me so... I can't even explain it. I grow frustrated then give up then my phone rings. pfft! he makes me so nervouse and I act all stupid. my stomach gets all achy when I see him. im so pathtic.
Things with the EX have been up and down lately. Mostly down. His girl sent me an email... it wasnt good, or appreciated. Since then there is alot of tension. Cameron and I leave for Disney tomorrow. yep Disney mother fuckers!! Im so excited. This will be my first time going. Matt had planned on taking Cameron the week after, but since we are going down, he and his girlfriend have since cancelled their trip. Seems that my plans ruined their's. Note: I did not know they were going until I notified him we were going. I feel that the place is big enough why not take your son a 2nd week, but NO they cancelled.... oh and this is the best part... He and his girl are now taking a vacation together alone that week, instead of taking his son along as planned. fucked up,I know. I get Cam all to my self for 2 weeks in a row. Its just another one of those things about matt that I will never understand. I always have felt out he misses out on more with Cam. I mean since he's infant, music has always been #1 to Matt, then he left for what 3 months on tour. matt is the one that is always switching the visitation schedule because of "other thing", and now this vacation. I don't doubt he loves his son, I know he loves him; immensly. I just don't understand the choices he makes,and how he can be away from Cam so willingly. i guess a mother's love is different? I dont know. I plan on taking lots of pics, and keeping a journal of our vacation. I may take my laptop and do some postings, we'll see.
Well I must get back to work....
tata
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Thursday, June 01, 2006
here i am...
You would think that since I have been so negligent with this here blog, that something interesting is going on in my life. Well sorry to say but life is pretty dull. Ok, not dull, just ummm smooth sailing, with a few speed bumps. hmm where to begin.
First off, our kitten Slippers passed away last friday night. He had caught something. I took him to the vet the week prior, spent $200.00 for the vet to say she didin;t know what was wrong sometimes kittens catch virus' and don't bounce back. Well at first he seemed to be doing well after the vet, but then things turned for the worse. Thankfully tlm wasnt home, and I had prepared prior that when he returned home that Slippers was not going to be there. I have never had a cat die like that before. It was heart wrenching, adn I feel like such a bad parent. Granted we didn'y have him for long, but I loved our kitty. Even though he drove me nuts nibbling on my lips when Im trying to lay in bed. I miss him, I miss what he was going to be as an adult kitty. so sad :(
On to happier things. TLM and I are going to Disney on the 16th! Can you believe it? I still can't! My Aunt is taking us. We are going with her and her son. This all came about, about a week ago. she called out of the blue and asked if we wanted to go. So we fly out Friday night. We are staying till Thusday! And get this the Ex is taking TLM down the following week. How crazy is that. I had no idea. So tlm gets to go down 2 weeks in a row. Im grateful that Matt and I get to experience this with TLM one right after another. And TLM is sure to remember!! He is very excited about his plain ride. Im very excited about everything!!! I've never been to disney or florida. yay!!!
The new apt. is great. So far no problems with anyone in the building. I love living there. Im so glad I moved. I have reconnected with an old friend by the name of Josh. We have been spending alot of time together in the past few months. Not in that way though! He is strictly a friend; and a good one at that! Man we watched last comic standing the other night and I dont remember ever laughing that hard. I always laugh when Josh and hang out. I'm think that the laughing is affecting me in a positive way. I've been feeling much happier about things lately.
Nothing ever happened with #1 crush... we hung out 2 weekends ago, and had a blast. Got hammered. Thought it was going to go somewhere, but he chickened out. I text him that I give up. I am too impatient, maybe that not good. But damn when I want something I want it. NOW. Not 2 months down the road. And getting calls maybe on a weekend... bleh!
the FB has been taken down a few notches. And things are going well. We do not speak every day. I don't want to. I have no interest in being his girlfriend. And even though he wants me back badly, I make it clear it isnt going to happen. I upfront and honest.
I have a date Tues. dinner and movie, with a boy from craiglist...lol... shut up I know. Im crazy!! We have been talking for a few weeks. He seems great, my only paranoia at this time is that he is a huge nerd...god am I shallow or what!
I'm sure I can think of more to say, but I must get back to work. I'll try and update this evening from home!
tata!
First off, our kitten Slippers passed away last friday night. He had caught something. I took him to the vet the week prior, spent $200.00 for the vet to say she didin;t know what was wrong sometimes kittens catch virus' and don't bounce back. Well at first he seemed to be doing well after the vet, but then things turned for the worse. Thankfully tlm wasnt home, and I had prepared prior that when he returned home that Slippers was not going to be there. I have never had a cat die like that before. It was heart wrenching, adn I feel like such a bad parent. Granted we didn'y have him for long, but I loved our kitty. Even though he drove me nuts nibbling on my lips when Im trying to lay in bed. I miss him, I miss what he was going to be as an adult kitty. so sad :(
On to happier things. TLM and I are going to Disney on the 16th! Can you believe it? I still can't! My Aunt is taking us. We are going with her and her son. This all came about, about a week ago. she called out of the blue and asked if we wanted to go. So we fly out Friday night. We are staying till Thusday! And get this the Ex is taking TLM down the following week. How crazy is that. I had no idea. So tlm gets to go down 2 weeks in a row. Im grateful that Matt and I get to experience this with TLM one right after another. And TLM is sure to remember!! He is very excited about his plain ride. Im very excited about everything!!! I've never been to disney or florida. yay!!!
The new apt. is great. So far no problems with anyone in the building. I love living there. Im so glad I moved. I have reconnected with an old friend by the name of Josh. We have been spending alot of time together in the past few months. Not in that way though! He is strictly a friend; and a good one at that! Man we watched last comic standing the other night and I dont remember ever laughing that hard. I always laugh when Josh and hang out. I'm think that the laughing is affecting me in a positive way. I've been feeling much happier about things lately.
Nothing ever happened with #1 crush... we hung out 2 weekends ago, and had a blast. Got hammered. Thought it was going to go somewhere, but he chickened out. I text him that I give up. I am too impatient, maybe that not good. But damn when I want something I want it. NOW. Not 2 months down the road. And getting calls maybe on a weekend... bleh!
the FB has been taken down a few notches. And things are going well. We do not speak every day. I don't want to. I have no interest in being his girlfriend. And even though he wants me back badly, I make it clear it isnt going to happen. I upfront and honest.
I have a date Tues. dinner and movie, with a boy from craiglist...lol... shut up I know. Im crazy!! We have been talking for a few weeks. He seems great, my only paranoia at this time is that he is a huge nerd...god am I shallow or what!
I'm sure I can think of more to say, but I must get back to work. I'll try and update this evening from home!
tata!
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